Stumble It!
Girl crack is wack.
There are a few decisions in a child’s life that should be left exclusively to her parents, and not to the parents of other kids. For example, a teen’s first sip of beer or wine, telling a child that they are adopted, or informing your daughter that she is actually a robot. These are topics that are off limits, in my humble opinion, to anyone but good old Raging Mom and Dad.
Another example in this category that I like to call, “Oh no she di’n't,” is giving my daughter a makeup kit for her sixth birthday. I mean, really. What the fuck? Makeup? She’s six. She is into Littlest Petshop and Barbie Princesses, not hookers and coke.
Here’s the scene: Connie is opening presents, and it is a great time for all involved. She’s got a few LPS animals, some pony shit and other cute–age appropriate–gifts from the gaggle of gals. It’s all charming and Raging Dad is happy, because none of these toys make loud bleeping noises or produce fake urine or fecal matter. It’s a good day.
Boy crack.
Then, Connie opens an oblong gift, and I struggle to recognize its form. Eventually, I realize–with horror–that it is a giant lipstick that opens up to reveal a full fledged makeup kit. This thing reminded me of the Darth Vader action figure carrying case I used to drag all over the place as a kid, except it wasn’t an insta-harlot transformation kit. I was a badass with my sith man-bag.
To top it off, the darling little girl who gave it to Connie promptly said, “My Mom really wanted me to get you makeup!”
Ahem. I see. This was a deliberate act of war. Noted.
Song of the day: “Lipstick Traces,” by UFO.
Filed under: raging thoughts | Tagged: birthday, darth vader, lipstick, makeup
Guy at the hardware store tried to give my daughter (3 yo) a lipstick candy while we were checking out. I said no.
My inlaws did this to me once. Came home to find my four year old daughter’s nails had been painted.
They will be buying her Bratz dolls next.
It’s really about temperament - my older girl is 14 and just this year started experimenting with eye makeup. I assume it was because she started high school and saw her peers, because before that? No interest whatsoever.
The younger girl is nine and I have to do a face-check every day, pre- and post-school, to make sure she isn’t trying to slip out of here in lip gloss and eye shadow.
Again - temperament. Best of luck to you, depending on which temperament your girl has.
Yikes, I don’t even own make up, which guarantees that my children never will.
Good luck to you and your predicament…remind her less is more.
Wow, I thought things like this only happened in Texas.
@Gary–Way to be strong!
@Dan–That will be a big NO on the Bratz. I have a No Hooker Toys rule in the house. (Note to self: add that to The Rules.)
@Melanie–She’s actually not that into it to begin with. We put the kit up in the closet when we got home, and she hasn’t asked for it. The same girl gave her a tub of blue lip gloss at her birthday party, and we still have blue spots in the carpet that will never go away!
@Brittany–Less is more, but NONE is more too!
@Mamarobot–Don’t worry, this only happens on the WEST side of town.
D’oh! I had that one coming to me.
Yes, let’s please leave harlot - tranformation for middle school at least!!
Me also, the day a Bratz doll passes my doorstep is the day I hand in my resignation as a father.
Crazy. I can’t believe someone would give makeup without asking you first.